Find Yourself Than Find Your Truths

Find yourself than find your truths.

Everyone has a failed love somewhere early in life. They just weren’t understood and loved unconditionally when the seeds were sown.  Parents of children are so invested in their own dramas and survival during those formative years that it’s near impossible to do. Many have been branded somewhere in time by a love situation that didn’t go right and its victim can suffer unconsciously for years. For men it can start with their mother (maybe a dynamic between the mother and father) and for women, their father. We long for the validation and recognition of our own wonder. We are a wonder, one of a kind. One of the most significant influences of love for me was my father’s mother. This grandmother had such love, acceptance, allowance, and understanding of who I was that I will never forget how she made me feel. She always said yes, not in an ego creating way. She would let me be and do what brought me happiness. So long as I didn’t get hurt she let me be. She had an amazing ability of creating delight and a sense of belonging in a child. I felt I was her favorite and so did each and every one of her 35 grandchildren. That power of unconditional love.

To get clear of the early love malfunction you need to identify it and address it. Embrace it and forgive the ignorance, neglect, whatever was the source of its creation. Realize that whatever it was that you needed and didn’t get emotionally, will continue to be a pattern in every new relationship. You will search for that validation in relationship after relationship. You will continue to play it out unconsciously until you make it conscious.  Once you are aware of your unconscious pattern you can learn to give yourself whatever you didn’t get but wanted, and let go of trying to find it in others. It’s like a wound that needs to be cleaned and looked at so it can heal properly. Whatever makes us suffer just needs more light and more love. So find the weed and pull it out at the root and toss it in the rubbish. Whatever you needed back then is possible to give yourself right now. It always comes around to love. Love is food. You go hungry without it. You get cranky without it. It gets more painful without it the longer you go. Babies die without it. It makes us old before our time if it stops.